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Hi, Alex here,

This is SpeakEasy, turning small talk into smart conversations.

Today:

  1. ๐Ÿ‘” Who wrote your script?

  2. ๐Ÿ’ธ How big is a trillion? And should we care?

  3. ๐Ÿช Trapped mid-chat? Not anymore.

  4. ๐Ÿ’€ A tiny killing quiz.

  5. ๐Ÿค– The robot that wonโ€™t let you pee in peace.

โ€ฆand more.

Update about the guide from a couple of weeks back.

The payment system has stopped throwing tantrums.

So Kill Awkward Silence launches this Friday for the promised $1 reader price.

Iโ€™ll send the link separately.

THE CULTURE CODE

Black-and-white image of a pair of childrenโ€™s trainers beside a pair of adult shoes, with the words โ€œRewrite the Scriptโ€ in bold text on the left.

๐Ÿ‘” Ghosts in the Nursery

1943.
You are Yakov, son of Stalin.
Your father is one of the most powerful men on earth.

You languish in a German prison camp.
The Nazis offer to exchange you for a captured German field marshal.
Dad says no.
You die a few months later.

Ouch.

Fatherโ€™s Day this Sunday.

For some people: a tie, a card, a pub lunch.
For othersโ€ฆmore complicated.

I wasnโ€™t close to my dad. No prison camps, but he was old-fashioned in the โ€œmostly found in a pubโ€ sense.
Then, for a while, we actually lived in one.
You can imagine how that went.

No big fatherly chats. No kicking a ball around the park.
Plenty of silence (although lots of free crisps).

Which, Iโ€™ve realised, is probably why I overcorrect with my daughters.
(And still eat way too many crisps).

Psychologists call it โ€œghosts in the nursery" โ€“ the idea that our parentsโ€™ patterns, fears, habits, and emotional scripts follow us around.

Oedipus. Hamlet. Luke Skywalker. Macaulay Culkin.

Daddy issues travel well, until we notice them.
Then we get a choice.

Repeat the script, or rewrite it.

The rewriting is harder.

I chose it. Results pendingโ€ฆ

๐Ÿ’ก PRO TIP: If it comes up, keep it gentle. Try: "Is Father's Day a big thing in your family?" Gives them the space to say, "Yeah, we're doing a big lunch" or "Not really", without forcing them to unpack thirty years of therapy over coffee.

FAMOUS WORDS

โ€œFatherhood is great because you can ruin someone from scratch."
(Jon Stewart, American comedian and host, 1962-present)

Gene Hackman in a beret and suit, happily riding a go-kart. Two boys in red tracksuits are driving behind him.

๐ŸŽฌ Name the film

๐Ÿ‘‡ Answer at the end

NEWS YOU CAN USE

Turn headlines into talking points

Pink-and-blue tinted image of laboratory glassware, including beakers, flasks, test tubes, and a stirring rod, with the words โ€œQuiet Scienceโ€ in bold text at the top left.

๐Ÿ’ธ Trillionaire Tunnel Vision

Elon Musk just became the richest human in recorded history.

$1.3 trillion.
(WSJ has this visualiser โ€“ a trillion is not a โ€˜bit moreโ€™ than a billion...it's mind-boggling.)
Since he started his first company 31 years ago, thatโ€™s roughly $1330 a second.
Everyโ€ฆsingleโ€ฆsecondโ€ฆ.
Thatโ€™s about $800,000 by the time you finish reading this newsletter.

Father of 14, by the way.
His own dad? Married his stepdaughter.
Generational trauma, but make it a rocket company.

Anyway, while Wall Street drools at one man becoming a money planet, a few quieter stories are actually worth your attention:

Oh, and somebody used a 5,000-year-old mummy to bake sourdough.

So yes, trillionaires are loud.

But the real future might be quieter: fewer cancers, repaired nerves, less disease, and possibly mummy toast, which probably tastes like Marmite.

๐Ÿ’ก PRO TIP: Nobody can picture a trillion. Everybody can picture $1,330. Find the per-second or per-day, and people will actually listen.

๐Ÿ’ฌ FOLLOW-UP: "If you could only fund one of those โ€” anti-ageing, cancer prediction, or fixing genetic disease before birth โ€” which one?"

โ›” DONโ€™T SAY: โ€œScience will fix everything.โ€ It wonโ€™t. But occasionally, it will make a sandwich from a corpse.

No cable. No subscription. Every match this summer, free.

104 matches. 48 teams. 39 days of football. Right now, streaming means logging into a cable account you don't have or paying for a subscription you'll cancel in August.

Norton Neo is a free browser with a free built-in VPN. No sign-up, no credit card, no catch. Private by default, backed by Norton security. Anti-fingerprinting and ad blocking run quietly in the background while you watch.

Download in 45 seconds. Watch every match for free.

Fast. Safe. Intelligent. That's Neo.

TALK TOOLBOX

Pink-tinted image of two silhouetted businesspeople in conversation, with long shadows on the floor and the words โ€œExit Strategyโ€ in bold text on the left.

๐Ÿช The Barnacle Escape

Imagine having a trillion reasons people want to talk to you.

Tech bros, investors, randoms with a โ€œquick ideaโ€ for life to Mars โ€” everyone wants a piece of Musk.

I get a tiny taste after speaking events.
Once, I excused myself: โ€œSorry, just need the loo.โ€
Came out and the guy was still there, hovering like a Victorian ghost.

Some people don't take hints.
When that happens, they need instructions.

Level 1 โ€” Polite, but unmissable:

  • โ€œLovely talking to you โ€” enjoy the rest of the event.โ€

  • โ€œI have to circulate now. Good to meet you.โ€

Level 2 โ€” Direct, if Level 1 fails:

  • โ€œI need to speak to Dave one-on-one, thanks for understanding.โ€

  • โ€œIโ€™m going to end this conversation now. Bye.โ€

Most people take the hint at Level 1.

The ones who donโ€™t have already broken the social contract โ€” so youโ€™re not the rude one here.

They are.

๐Ÿ’ก PRO TIP: Your time and energy are valuable. โ€œI need to go becauseโ€ฆโ€ gives them something to grab. โ€œI can only talk for two minutesโ€ works better (works on chatty uncles, co-workers and kids, too).

โ›” DONโ€™T SAY: โ€œIโ€™ll be right back.โ€
Theyโ€™ll believe you. Then youโ€™ve accidentally scheduled a sequel.

WORD WISE

๐Ÿ’€ The โ€˜Cideโ€™ Guide

Stalin didnโ€™t exactly win Fatherโ€™s Day.

He didnโ€™t technically commit filicide (killing your own child), but refusing to save your son from a prison camp is definitely kill-adjacent.

The โ€˜-cideโ€™ suffix does a lot of dark work in English.

Matricide: mother.
Patricide: father.
Insecticide: destroying those relentless bugs.

Cheerful stuff.

So, quick quiz โ€” whatโ€™s being killed?

  • Regicide

  • Felicide

  • Tyrannicide

  • Linguicide

  • Floricide

โฌ‡๏ธ Answers at the end.

๐Ÿ’ก PRO TIP: Timing matters. Donโ€™t drop โ€œpatricideโ€ into Fatherโ€™s Day lunch.
(Even if youโ€™re thinking it).

BECAUSE THE ROBOTS ARE COMING

๐Ÿค– Beni There

Meet Beni โ€” a jumping, all-terrain $499 camera robot that auto-follows you everywhere, filming in 4K.

Cute? Absolutely
Useful? Probably.
Will it follow you into the toilet like a tiny wheeled barnacle?

Almost certainly.

A robot for people who thought GoPro needed more stalker energy.
(Guess we now need a โ€˜cideโ€™ for cameraman? Lensicide?)

๐Ÿ’ฌ FOLLOW UP: Useful sidekick or surveillance goblin?

BITS โ€˜N BOBS

Did you see..?
Four-panel collage of blurry, poorly framed photos, including the Statue of Liberty at night, a seagull on a lamp post, a snowy landscape from a window, and a harbour at night.

ANSWER

๐ŸŽฌ The Royal Tenenbaums (2001)

Promotional image for The Royal Tenenbaums, showing an ensemble cast of serious-looking characters posed against a white background, with the film title in large black text across the top.

Gene Hackman fakes terminal illness to wheedle his way back into his estranged family's lives. Cue chaos, and a hilarious stabbing.

  • ๐ŸŒŽ Cultural Impact: Wes Anderson's breakout โ€” symmetrical shots, deadpan delivery, and an indie soundtrack.

  • ๐Ÿง  Deep Dive: The falcon? Stolen and held to ransom. They had to get a different bird.

๐Ÿ’ฌ YOUR TURN: Who's the worst movie dad you can think of?

๐Ÿ’€ The โ€˜Cideโ€™ Guide

Regicide โ€” a king or queen
Felicide โ€” a cat
Tyrannicide โ€” a tyrant, not a tiny-armed dinosaur
Linguicide โ€” a language
Floricide โ€” flowers or plants, not toothpaste

LAST WEEK

๐Ÿ“Š POLL: What's your World Cup mode?

A) โšฝ๏ธ Fully in โ€” I've already cleared my diary (20%)
B) ๐Ÿ‘€ Watching for the drama, not the football (14%)
C) ๐Ÿบ Only if there's a pub and a reason to shout (33%)
D) ๐Ÿ˜ด Wake me when itโ€™s over (33%)

Screenshot of a โ€œReaderโ€™s Voiceโ€ section showing blurred reader details and a comment saying they want to rewatch A League of Their Own and that The Sandlot had a special place in their heart as a child.

Two great films! As a kid I loved Slap Shot. Or Bad News Bears.

THIS IS THE END

๐Ÿ‘‹๐Ÿป That's all, folks!

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Until next time, keep it smart.

P.S. Missed an issue? Check out The Library ๐Ÿ˜ƒ

P.P.S. Not feeling it? You can unsubscribe below.๐Ÿ‘‡ But remember:

Life is too big for small talk

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